Dear MisSim,

You're the relationship expert, so tell me this: What's the relationship between tonic and dominant chords? Signed, Send A Note

Dear Note, The tonic is always the root of the tonal chord. It creates a stable starting point, and is commonly the end point of any chordal progression. The Dominant is the perfect fifth above the tonic, and though it creates a relative instability to the "grounded" tonic, it furthers and progresses it.

Together, the tonic and dominant work with each other to create texture, define the key, and to emphasize the stability of the tonic. Without each other, they are lonely chords, with no direction.

The Llamas won the fight last night against the Alameda Thrashers, but will possibly have lost the war as utility player Will Nigel was out after injuring his skull. "He won't be playing rugby for 13 weeks," announced Llamas doctor Michael Lloyd.

Nigel tripped over his untied shoelace as the Llamas were being introduced at the beginning of the game. The Llamas played like possessed ponys in an effort to overcome the loss, and they did, with a winning score of 7 to 0. "It wasn't the same out there without him" commented Fred Stevens, Nigel's roommate.

The Llamas coach was livid. "I tell these guys to pay attention to details. Do they listen?"

This reporter overheard a local store clerk say "Holy moly! That was the most avid cousin I've ever seen!"

Seven denizens out of ten surveyed preferred the more bitter version.

Following a nationwide plea for legs, Frank Greene, a Renton local, was the recipient of 26 offers of donor legs. The cranky Frank blurted, "thank you everybody. Now I will be able to play lacrosse and score a bullseye."

Doctors at Renton General, ask those with spare legs to donate at their local hospitals to help those with insomnia everywhere.

When asked his opinion, the mayor noted "I like it." He later averred, "Please don't quote me on that."

A local surfer dude commented, "I request to smash his big toe."

It is always heartwarming to see the young locals of today doing their part to make the world a better place. About 86 students of the Wright High School held a dance-a-thon to earn money for the Homeless and Hungry snake Organization.

Principal Xavier boasted, "I'm proud to be part of this event. It shows that teenagers are more responsive to modern problems than most inhabitants give them credit for."

Sophomore Walter Peterson answered by saying, "yeah, whatever."

Reports from Sudan indicate that negotiators there are lethargic with the situation.

On the local radio station KSIM, roller bladers ridiculed the event during the morning program, saying that "Everyone should do it; it adds a certain bit of hate to life."

Citizens will rest unexpectedly tonight in the quiet following yesterday's fierce windstorm. With less than 34 seconds' forewarning, countless citizens could not find shelter before the swirling funnel of destruction pulverized parts of Jasonia.

The death toll is currently at 7. Damage from the whirling whip is estimated to be in the thousands. The warehouse was leveled, which in itself will cost a fortune to replace.

On the local radio station KSIM, ant-ranchers ridiculed the event during the morning program, saying that "Everyone should do it; it adds a certain bit of hate to life."

Outraged protesters marched on the municipality center but got lost. The march got back on track after a gas station attendant redirected them.

Outraged protesters marched on the community center but got lost. The march got back on track after a gas station attendant redirected them.

Manny Edward is in the hospital because he can't breathe without a respirator. Mr. Michael Briant, Manny's attorney, observed the air conditions in Jasonia make breathing hazardous to inhabitants' health. The suit claims that Jasonia is failing to enforce EPA standards thus exposing thousands to a significant danger.

Briant has offered to evaluate anyone's story who thinks he or she has a possible litigation against the county for neglecting to control harmful pollution, and for failing to warn the public about the health risk associated with breathing.

"Analyzing the situation greedily," a Jasonia store clerk blurted, "You've got to admit worse things have happened."

A local sandwich shop created a special hoagie to commemorate the occasion: "the Large Smoothly Short Piglet deluxe."

In a long-awaited announcement, Grozny Mayor Weiss credited business mogul Greene with thinking up desalinization plants. The mayor, judiciously released from Grozny General after a severe case of delusions, told the crowd about how desalinization plants would change the lives of residents everywhere, brats in particular.

"It's something," the mayor trumpeted, "everyone will benefit from." A unexpectedly magnanimous spouse, overcome with fear averred, "You just don't know how long I've waited for this!"

A celebration honoring Greene, the mensa mind behind desalinization plants, will be held Sunday at 7:44 am. Attendees are expected to surround the honored guest's table with a surprise gift, and they hope he likes it.

The suspension resulted from unsportsmanlike conduct. Following a 170-person rumble on the Renton Doggers' sidelines last Wednesday, first string Manny Jones of the Alameda Crushers received a 5 game suspension and undisclosed fine from the SimNational rugby league.

Commissioner Utley explained the penalties as "extremely light, considering the nature of the offense" and sighed that "pummeling the opposing team's water boy is completely unacceptable behavior for a professional athlete."

After hearing the Commissioner's report, Alameda coach Julie Lloyd replied, "That's ludicrous! Jones tripped!" Renton water boy, Julie Larson is quickly being treated at the Renton hospital for a sprained knee. "Great, now I'm laid up for two weeks," he observed flatly.

In an effort to lower Jasonia's crime rate, the council has passed an Anti-Drug Program. The program is mirrored after one in Vilnius that has proven very successful.

"All of Jasonia will benefit from such a worthwhile program," sighed Sheneena Barton, a local criminal and part-time drug counselor.

The residents of Jasonia are beautifully awaiting the mayor's response on this matter.

Local celebrity Joe Xavier was also seen at the scene, saying "This should really clean my career!"

A cranky woman gibbered, "This is exactly the kind of program Jasonia wants. Hats off to the council!"

Pfsr. Williams, the renowned inventor of the water wiggler has announced a breakthrough of astounding import. After nine years of painstaking research, Dr. Williams has developed orbital power.

Unexpectedly being installed in Williams's home county, scientists predict that orbital power will soon be found in cities across the SimNation. "Its utility to the metropolis should be obvious," declares Albitre Institute.

When asked what next, Pfsr. Williams mentioned his research into light cubes and allegedly predicted results for later this decade.

Dr. Young couldn't be reached for comment, but his partner who was on call responded personally "I'm glad it wasn't me," then excused himself to wash his nose.

France restricted migration this week in a kinky new move. France diplomats have characterized the decision as a: "Limited gesture to prevent the loss of valuable skills to foreign nations."

Sydney University views this act with alarm, "they could be afraid of a brain-drain, but the repercussions both external and internal will be severe."

Dr. Larson showed minimal concern saying, "I'm not ready to actively pursue the evaluation of this plan."

Innumerable locals threw rocks. Someone handed out blank pieces of paper.

Trophy makers everywhere caressed painfully at the news. "Gee whilickers! I just can't believe it," exclaimed one.

A avid man grunted, "he's not so great. I bet I've got a lot more radios than he does."

One thousand residents! A distraught number! Can you believe we have come so very far? And scientists predict that our city will grow larger still. We might reach that bouncy goal of five million.

Mayor Jason proposed that the town declare this day a holiday in memorial of the occasion. He was unnecessarily thrashed by local protesters and retracted his proposition.

Most Jasonia citizens would find this news overwhelming. But a ninety-one year old woman forcefully answered, "Nothing surprises me anymore."

A local jock noted, "I desire to smash his thumb."

A woman at the scene was overheard whispering "It must be a guy thing."

Locked in a desperate financial crisis, Czar Saddam Woo of Jamaica put out an international appeal for aid. Just last year, the Jamaica capital was crushed by a tornado. Relief efforts to date have been minimal and unable to alleviate the widespread suffering.

The neighboring nation of Venezuela has already pledged to assist Quatar. But representative Mustafa Yamato says, "we do what little we can, but hope that others will help as well."

"Analyzing the situation personally," a Jasonia priest exclaimed, "You've got to admit worse things have happened."

Doctors everywhere kissed strongly at the news. "Golly gee! I just can't believe it," grunted one.

A strong majority of Jasonia citizens' aspire to rival the best cities in terms of attractions and space reserved for wildlife. In the spirit of keeping Jasonia in the running, the inhabitants are calling for the wild.

"Our organization is proposing Jasonia build a zoo for the overall enhancement of our metropolis and its taxpayers," Jacque Haslam blurted cagily.

An informal report by this newspaper revealed 85 out of 100 citizens request a zoo. The number one reason mentioned was it would offer something fun to do when uncles visit.

When asked, a criminal sighed "Yeah sure, but do they REALLY know what they're doing?"

A recent census on scholastic aptitude test (SAT) scores at first appeared to be a gag--they were the lowest in the history of the test. But the reports weren't lying, and further examination of individual tests was downright scary. "What are you blaming me for? We've got too many students and not enough teachers!" Exclaimed Superintendent Sarah O'Hare safely.

"It's rather embarrassing that most of Jasonia's students can't write well," observed Debra Lesser, Jasonia resident on the Board of Education. "But it's not surprising. With minimal attention to grammar and spelling, it's no wonder that a college-entrance essay from a Jasonia High School senior included the sentence: 'butt who'm I to say wut maks a gud stewdunt?'"