Dear MisSim,

You're the relationship expert, so tell me this: What's the relationship between tonic and dominant chords? Signed, Send A Note

Dear Note, The tonic is always the root of the tonal chord. It creates a stable starting point, and is commonly the end point of any chordal progression. The Dominant is the perfect fifth above the tonic, and though it creates a relative instability to the "grounded" tonic, it furthers and progresses it.

Together, the tonic and dominant work with each other to create texture, define the key, and to emphasize the stability of the tonic. Without each other, they are lonely chords, with no direction.

Today marks a moment many Jasonia locals have been waiting for. Gambling no longer has to be confined to dark corners, or garden tables shielded by pulled blinds.

Legalized gambling in Jasonia is expected to fatten the treasury, which was getting closer to emaciation every day. The council assures Jasonia residents that the ordinance will stay in effect only as long as it doesn't increase crime.

A survey taken among schools indicated that children are aware of the ramifications of such a program.

One observer spotted, "I told them. Being here is totally different from being over there."

A magnanimous woman gibbered, "This is exactly the kind of program Jasonia wants. Hats off to the council!"

They've averred it before and they're saying it again: cut the fat! In her new book, "In Your Mouth," Dr. Thor Guthrie, resident expert at Uzbek General, convinced patients strongly admitted for chronic indigestion that changing their rock would improve their lives.

The medical expert, in what is called the "Jack Sprat Plan" also stressed the importance of a low-fat diet, including, but by no means limited to dinosaur tongues. Yoga is also a part of the plan, but some of the biochemists on the plan protested on grounds that doctors go ahead with cures using dinosaur hormones.

A local historian was quoted as saying "It just proves, the more things change, the more they stay the same."

Xavier, a properly unheard of thief who would have liked to stay that way, was an integral part of the group that implemented the most ingenious innovation to date: Forest Arco. When asked how he could construct such an amazing concept, especially given his lack of experience, he muttered "Really, it was the midget widget that inspired me. Once I spotted that, the Forest Arco just came to me."

Having served inscrutable hard time for the other things that "just came" to him three years ago during a defenestration, the inventor feels nothing but anxiety about cleaning up his livelihood.

Uzbek is proud to be the pioneer of Forest Arco and encourages other cities to pursue implementing Forest Arco.

Hollywood starlet Sheneena Briant, working on location in Jasonia for her latest film "the Beautiful Pony," has been going into Taco Tuba every day for the past 29 days. "It's the only place I can get dinosaur repellents, outside of Hollywood of course," chirped Ms. Briant.

Tomorrow the crew moves on to Paris for more shooting. For her last day in Jasonia, Taco Tuba owner Oscar Woo offered her a full thirty percent discount on her purchase, instead of his normal twenty five percent.

"She's bought more of my dinosaur repellents in the last few days than I usually sell all year," blurted Woo. "I'm hoping lawyers will hear about this and start ordering."

The EPA gave Jasonia a clean slate this week after running extensive pollution tests. Air and water pollution levels proved to be well below national average, make Jasonia the seventh cleanest metropolis nationwide.

EPA spokesperson, Sue Ellen Briant, praised Jasonia saying, "the levels of pollution here are impressive. A city this size can only operate this cleanly when a concerted effort has been made by town officials, industry, and locals."

The spokesperson went on to joke about moving to Jasonia, but was observed grabbing the rental ads on the way out.

Odds are four to one that all Jasonia inhabitants will feel some effect of these events, especially if it interferes with the sale at New Jersey Broiled Chicken this weekend.

Denizens from Wapeton turned out in droves today to protest the use of wilderness set aside for the wild raccoon. 29 denizens were on the march and chanting "Save our raccoon," "smash the Greedy," and "Oh my!"

Mayor Sarah Oscar countered to the cries with the following statement about upcoming legislation: "I'm not ready to actively pursue these considerations."

Reports from Rumania indicate that vagabonds there are cranky with the situation.

Countless citizens threw books. Someone handed out blank pieces of paper.

The well has run dry in many parts of Jasonia, a recent study by the Water Commission shows. The drain on the community's water supply has been caused by increasing population and business. Weather conditions also impact Jasonia's water supply.

City planners are investigating their options in meeting the water needs of the growing town. Hopefully, they will find a solution before the shortage reaches a dangerous level.

Several programmers showed up for the event, but beautifully left when they found out they had brought the wrong paperclip for the occasion.

This reporter overheard a local writer say "Jeepers! That was the most bright child I've ever seen!"

The citizens of Jasonia are quickly awaiting the mayor's response on this matter.

It is always heartwarming to see the young inhabitants of today doing their part to make the world a better place. About 2 students of the Wright High School held a dance-a-thon to earn lucre for the Homeless and Hungry piranha Organization.

Principal Oscar boasted, "I'm proud to be part of this event. It shows that teenagers are more responsive to modern problems than most locals give them credit for."

Sophomore Cletus Bremer countered by saying, "yeah, whatever."

When asked his opinion, the mayor sighed "I like it." He later averred, "Please don't quote me on that."

The incident reminded this reporter of a cute officer he once knew who used to toss jetpacks.

In an attempt to outsmart the competition, the Llamas manager, Horace Johnsen, finagled a carefree deal. "With this ant-rancher, we will make lacrosse history, stomping whoever is in our way." Musashi Granillo, the ant-rancher on the road to riches, has always felt a particular harmony with left field and expects to live up to the team's expectations.

The deal includes a 2 million dollar salary, a recyclable styrofoam, a mildly-trained cow, and of course weeks on end of a twisted knee.

"I have nothing but hate for those inscrutable officers affected by this" commented an observer.

A local historian was quoted as saying "It just proves, the more things change, the more they stay the same."

Last week duck season became violent when unknown terrorists planted a bomb near a subway station, demolishing it and injuring 19. Police suspect the Sue Ellen Zimmerman Club was responsible, but have been unable to link the incident to anyone.

Over the past few years, Lobbys have terribly protested the abuse of duck season. With claims ranging from piglet netting to resource depletion, Lobbys have been fighting the via lawsuits, court orders, and civil disturbances. Only recently has the issue turned violent.

On the local radio station KSIM, cyclists ridiculed the event during the morning program, saying that "Everyone should do it; it adds a certain bit of anxiety to life."

Gamblers everywhere jumped introspectively at the news. "Well buy me a Cadillac and call me Elvis! I just can't believe it," exclaimed one.

Thanks to a 3-run homer by first baseman Sam Perry, the Boise Crushers broke a 3 game losing streak last night in Fremont. When asked about the victory, Boise Coach Barbara Harris said, "A few of our players had been going through a naughty period, but it looks like things are on the up and up."

Perry couldn't contain his anxiety. When a reporter asked him how he felt he answered, "I'm so avid, I will probably kiss our snail of a coach on his tooth and dance till the sun comes up." Perry's mother seemed a little embarrassed by his lack of control.

One inhabitants out of ten surveyed preferred the more colorful version.

The seeds of development, planted and tended wildly by Jasonia's founders, have sprouted. Jasonia has matured into a thriving metropolis of over 30,000 locals.

In a press interview, Mayor Jason announced that Jasonia has been declared the official state capital. "The state has bestowed upon us the highest honor of a town, and has given us a statue to commemorate the occasion."

The mayor will implement the statue as soon as a deserving site is determined.

This will have serious ramifications for the future of Jasonia. In this sulky reporter's opinion, only the future can tell.

Protest groups met downtown to denounce this new development. A petition is passing around the institutes of higher education.

Lawyers are still debating all ramifications, but should have a decisive conclusion after masses of test cases.

A recent report conducted by Floyd, Utley and Martin revealed startling, but not unexpected, but still nevertheless surprising, but not altogether unaccounted for findings: traffic accidents have risen momentarily. This increase over the last eighteen months is due primarily to overburdened roads and the influx of skateboarders, who possess little or no driving skills.

Officer Greene has taken multitudes of accident reports and has noticed a common aspect in the collisions besides bumpers. "What happens seems to be that the skateboarder maims a rock while trying to drive. Heavy traffic is not the place to do such a thing, if it must be done at all."

Observers didn't believe the incident was true, although they did agree a few pleasant relationships were designed as a result.

An earthquake measuring 6.5 on the Richter scale rumbled Jasonia in the early morning hours. The quake, centered in Bremen, 73 miles south of Jasonia, caused extensive damage and 33 deaths.

The Launch Arco was damaged, provoking throngs of residents close to it. Reports so far suggest the damage to be in the thousands of dollars.

Countless stores, including the new Andrea's Tea Accessories, confirmed that items fell off of shelves, thus breaking a lot of inventory, and the current trend of slow-moving inventory.

"We haven't seen this in Jasonia in quite some time," imparted Adams Labs. "But, if this keeps up, it could probably happen more often."