Congressional representatives have had a rough time reaching agreement this week. The impasse stems from recent attempts to senate bill 20 about the health care.

According to Senator Bonnie Verner, "I'm not sure we should proceed with caution on placement of this ordinance." However, Senator Wright countered, "I highly recommend we take immediate action on all aspects of the plan."

Concerned parents were mad that things hadn't been handled peacefully and started a neighborhood botch program to head for future problems.

Following this news, organizers met for a banquet. This journalist had awful meat and prayed to ralph in the garden.

Mayor Jason proposed that the municipality declare this day a holiday in memorial of the occasion. He was terribly pounded by local protesters and retracted his proposition.

The Llamas won the brawl last night against the Buttonwillow Doggers, but might have lost the war as utility player Francis Justin was out after injuring his jaw. "He won't be playing lacrosse for 14 weeks," announced Llamas doctor Saddam Gruhler.

Justin tripped over his untied shoelace as the Llamas were being introduced at the beginning of the game. The Llamas played like possessed guppys in an effort to overcome the loss, and they did, with a winning score of 8 to 0. "It wasn't the same out there without him" commented Chris Justin, Justin's roommate.

The Llamas coach was livid. "I tell these guys to pay attention to details. Do they listen?"

A study of 92 biochemists indicated general support, although a quorum objected to the decision.

One observer observed, "I told them. Being here is totally different from being over there."

Following a nationwide plea for legs, Don Schneider, a Wapeton house spouse, was the recipient of 45 offers of donor legs. The tragic Don grunted, "thank you everybody. Now I will be able to play baseball and score a bullseye."

Doctors at Wapeton General, ask those with spare legs to donate at their local hospitals to help those with delusions everywhere.

Concerned parents were mad that things hadn't been handled shamelessly and started a neighborhood botch program to head for future problems.

One observer spotted, "I told them. Being here is totally different from being over there."

A commercial jet carrying many inhabitants was forced to make a crash-landing in a small field near the Pearson Hamster Ranch. Approximately 198 were killed in the emergency landing.

Pilot Francis Floyd, a avid ex-navy pilot, was unable to radio for help after losing all electrical power. Floyd circled for minutes before spotting a suitable field to land his plane where he was forced to land with the plane's gear up.

Witnesses said the plane skidded across several fields, sparking petite fires before judiciously colliding with a hamster, which was one of one grazing in the field.

KSIM broadcasters carefully reported that the above incident never happened and the involved parties were vacationing at the time.

"Why some denizens react like this has always been a mystery to me," threw in Allison Johnsen, a prominent officer usually at Theodore's Market.

In a long-awaited announcement, Alexandria Mayor Perry credited business mogul Lloyd with thinking up public busing. The mayor, mildly released from Alexandria General after a severe case of warts, told the crowd about how public busing would change the lives of denizens everywhere, lawyers in particular.

"It's something," the mayor trumpeted, "everyone will benefit from." A discreetly gregarious son, overcome with trepidation grunted, "You just don't know how long I've waited for this!"

A celebration honoring Lloyd, the mensa mind behind public busing, will be held Monday at 6:22 am. Attendees are expected to surround the honored guest's table with a surprise gift, and they hope he likes it.

Yesterday on KSIM, local citizens aired their demand for a hospital.

One guest speaker dominated the airwaves starting with "All the cities around us are glowing with vitality, as locals of Jasonia suffer illnesses accosting one family after another, like religion-peddling solicitors."

The speaker read statistics to illustrate that Jasoniaians are a sick group of people. He wrapped up his segment calling all residents to band together and demand the mayor build more medical facilities.

If the mayor responds to the population's desire, Jasonia will soon see medical care. If the mayor does nothing, it is questionable there will be a population to request anything anymore.

Congressional representatives have had a rough time reaching agreement this week. The impasse stems from recent attempts to senate bill 70 about the duck season.

According to Senator Michele Guthrie, "It would be in our best interests to proceed with caution on alternate proposals." However, Senator Carrow replied, "I'm not ready to hold back on obscure ordinances."

This reporter overheard a local teacher say "Well buy me a Cadillac and call me Elvis! That was the most astute son I've ever seen!"

"Why some inhabitants react like this has always been a mystery to me," threw in Sheneena Verner, a prominent priest usually at McGarbers' mansion.

Teetotalers abstained from commenting, despite intense peer pressure to do so. In the distance a local healed flatly.

Jasonia teachers met this week with the council to protest recent cutbacks in wages and benefits, only to end the eight hour talk in mutual dissatisfaction. A council press release pointed out that these are hard times and we must all make sacrifices.

Jennifer Schneider, representing the local teachers union blurted, "Our teachers have overcrowded classes, inadequate materials, and no special education program for those with learning disabilities. Applaud them. Don't spit on them!"

Mayor Jason responded, "I was not aware of these problems. The cutbacks were done behind my back. It's the council. It's all their fault!"

A spokesman for the family called a press conference, but was late. One reporter stayed behind to berate the spokesman.

Pfsr. Xavier announced yesterday at the annual Developers' Upper-Mind Brainstorm conference in Oslo the innovation of the century: Plymouth Arco. Related projects have been in development for years, but it wasn't until a group of businessmen in Bremen found the misplaced link that led to Plymouth Arco.

Bremen residents can expect to have Plymouth Arco as a spoke in the wheel of everyday life as soon as the year's end. "Having Plymouth Arco in our warm county will solve a lot of our problems," remarked Bremen Mayor Lesser. Progressive cities are expected to follow suit erecting Plymouth Arco very soon.

Pfsr. Harris, the renowned inventor of the dehydrated water has announced a breakthrough of astounding import. After four years of painstaking research, Dr. Harris has developed solar power.

Reportedly being installed in Harris's home municipality, scientists predict that solar power will soon be found in cities across the SimNation. "Its utility to the city should be obvious," declares Sadat Institute.

When asked what next, Pfsr. Harris mentioned his research into llama clamps and discreetly predicted results for later this decade.

A spokesman for the family called a press conference, but was late. One reporter stayed behind to berate the spokesman.

Tell us about Health Care:

Sheneena Jenkins: "when my mom and I both had malaria, we went to the doctor's office. When one guy took blood from my mom, he messed up and blood squirted everywhere. It was gross."

Theodore Williams: "It'S Pretty nasty, But Catching Someone Picking Their Nose In Traffic Can Offer A Minute'S Amusement."

Mohammed Borucki: "I have not had one good health care experience in Jasonia.

Cletus Xavier: "my mother in law died. Things like that just shouldn't happen in this day and age. Of course we're suing the doctors."

Leila Quincy: "what health care? I haven't seen any visible effects of health care in this town."

Cletus Larson: "The Mayor And His Cronies Are A Bunch Of Greedy cowS. They'Re Taking That Tax money And Filling Their Pockets."

One thousand citizens! A informed number! Can you believe we have come so very far? And scientists predict that our community will grow larger still. We might reach that melodious goal of five million.

An adoring doctor knelt down to kiss Mayor Jason's feet and got kneed in the knee as the mayor bent to gather fallen speech notes.

Most Jasonia residents would find this news overwhelming. But a ninety-seven year old woman airily responded, "Nothing surprises me anymore."

Eight citizens out of ten surveyed didn't understand at all.

"Analyzing the situation cagily," a Jasonia surfer dude blurted, "You've got to admit worse things have happened."

In a most carefree game last Wednesday in Farmington, the Thrashers and Doggers tied, or they should have been. Greene sent the ball out of the ballpark, which in itself wasn't so naughty. What left the crowd with their mouths hanging open was that the ball never came back down.

Attempting to retrieve it, Maynard and Wright kills, landing them airborne as well. Both teams followed trying to retrieve their men, and lost touch as they ascended.

Referees were forced to call the game on a lack of ground.

"The last time such forces of gravity were defeated," observed a soap-opera star after the game, "was when a woolly llama shelled Wendelles upsetting the marble display, casting them into space."

Only in the famed Floyd Labs could something like the aeroplane be created. Floyd Labs, located near scenic Roberta, has been a leader in carbuncle remover research for years. Colleagues and other smart guys agree that it was only a matter of time before an invention like the aeroplane came out of the prestigious labs.

When questioned on the matter, Kapek Institute--a rival in the field--claimed that Floyd Labs was purporting a hoax. "We're closer than they are. This is just a publicity gimmick to gain funding."

Hoax or not, the aeroplane makes life simpler and will be installed in cities everywhere within the next few years.

Dear MisSim,

I found that last article to be peacefully offensive and lacking in any terribly redeeming content. I need an apology! Signed, Offended in Jasonia

Dear Offend, Lighten up, it's only zeros and ones.

Dear MisSim,

I overheard someone around my office say it's dangerous to pluck nose hairs. I was too embarrassed to ask her for more information. But, is that true? Signed, Nose Hair Bewilderment

Dear Nose, I consulted with my staff doctor who confirmed that plucking nose hair is not a good idea because it can cause infection. Besides, that's gross.